To eat or to dine? That is the question. In today’s busy lifestyle, it can be easy to take for granted all the blessings in our lives—things as simple as having food in the refrigerator, being able to go out for a meal and even have someone cook for us at home. I ask you today when you eat, are you “eating” or “dining?” There is so much available to us when we come to the table, but are you leaving the best part of the meal untouched?
When we “eat” we are only consuming food to fill the need of hunger. When we eat this way we only fulfill one basic need. However, when you “dine”—taking in the experience, the food, the environment and the company—you fulfill the need of hunger as well as intellection and community. As humans, we need more than just food to live and be happy; we must be challenged to keep our minds sharp and actively working, and we are meant to be in relationship with others. When we gather around the table, all of these aspects are available to us but so often not acted upon, leaving the most beneficial part of the meal unconsumed. Here are a few techniques to help you get the most out of your next meal.
Three Ways To Build Better Relationships Through Eating
Technology at the table. First, let’s sit at an actual table not on the couch in front of the television. I encourage you to adopt a no-technology at the table policy. I know, it may sound harsh but it is worth the benefits. By not having the distraction of technology there is space for conversation and for you to be in the environment of setting a space for the meal and community. Most people spend less than 30 minutes at the table, anyway. Also, put the phone down and take a look at the people you are with. If the person who is calling or texting is that important and just can’t wait, next time invite them to dinner as well.
Tell me what was good about your day. Now that you have space for conversation, practice asking open-ended positive questions. This not only gets people sharing, but the positive focus lets people bring up what was good and worth celebrating, boosting self-esteem. Instead of asking, “How was your day?” which usually prompts a one-word answer of good or okay, try asking, “What’s new and good?” or “Tell me what was good about your day.”
Cook together. The best way to get people interested in the meal is to ask them to be a part of it. This also takes some of the work away from the person who is doing all of the cooking alone. This not only makes kitchen work easier and more enjoyable, it creates a space for conversation and learning. Let members of the family help decide what is for dinner and learn what it takes to create balanced meals. Chopping vegetables or making a salad dressing, even setting the table is beneficial in more ways than one. Allow others to help in the kitchen. You will be surprised at what happens and the life-long memories and skills you will have shared.